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Introducing The First #ModestMavens Stamp Of Approval Winner: Girls Will Be

October 13, 2014 By: Stephanie8 Comments

Modest Mavens Stamp of Approval

For the past two weeks, life has gotten more than a little crazy. I have heard from more retailers than I can count, television producers, magazines, etc. It turns out, the world is actually paying very close attention to Mommy Bloggers. Who knew? When I pulled out my phone and started snapping pictures, I certainly never expected that blog post to become international news, but it did. So here we are. 

I am still dealing with my own health issues on top of everyday life. As you know, being a mom of three is no small task in itself.

In the midst of all of the crazy, I feel very fortunate to have been able to make some connections with other moms who share my concern about providing our girls with better clothing options. One of those moms was Sharon, a founding member and mom behind the clothing company Girls Will Be. Girls Will Be is a family-owned company that Sharon founded with her own siblings when they noticed the same problems with shorts manufactured for girls that I did. They wanted to offer girls shorts that were not overly baggy, like the ones in the boy’s department, but that did have a longer inseam, functioning pockets, and some cool other features I will tell you about in a minute. Sharon was kind enough to send two pairs of shorts and two t-shirts for my girls to test. This is not a sponsored post because, other than the clothing you see here, I received no monetary compensation. Sharon just wanted to let her clothes speak for themselves.

Clothes from Girls Will Be

We received the Be Bold Tee in a size 2T (infant/toddler size). We also received the Be Unique Tee, the Perfect Play Shorts, and the Casual Cargo Shorts. All of the clothes Abby is wearing are a size 6/7.

outfits from Girls Will Be tee shirt from Girls Will Be

What I loved:

  • Although I have two super girly girls, it was nice to see some variety besides pink and purple. Actually, that was the very first thing my husband noted that he was relieved to see when we opened the package.
  • The big girl t-shirt was tagless, which is a big deal around here.
  • The clothes are made in the US
  • I have to confess, I thought the shorts were going to be too big. Abby is a tall and skinny kid. When we first put them on, it looked like she would swim in them. But because of the drawstring on the Perfect Play Shorts and the adjustable waist on the cargo shorts, both pairs fit her perfectly. And since there is plenty of room to grow, I think she will easily be able to wear them again next year. After that they can be passed on to Penny, so we might get 4 years in a row out of these shorts.
  • They sure must be comfy. The shirts are 100% cotton and pre-washed to minimize shrinkage. Abby actually insisted on sleeping in her Perfect Play Shorts and her new t-shirt instead of regular pajamas.
  • Although there appears to be a button on the front of the cargo shorts, it is actually a slide, so Abby is easily able to get them on and off herself to use the bathroom.
  • The length is perfect on her.
  • I loved the idea of a Designer of the Month. Right now it is Zoe, who is 10 and designed the Be Mighty shirt.
  • They seem to wear well. I squirted a good deal of mustard on the Perfect Play Shorts to test for stain removal. All of it came out in one wash.

Girls Will Be shorts stain removal test

What Abby loved:

  • Abby, who is in kindergarten, loved the idea of getting a package in the mail.
  • She also loved how comfortable the clothes were, and would not take them off, even insisting on sleeping in them.
  • She was very excited to see that the cargo shorts had real, functioning belt loops. This never even crossed my mind until she squealed, “I can wear a real belt if I want to?!” and I realized that most of her pants actually do not have belt loops, or they have a decorative belt sewn in.
  • Pockets. Real, actual pockets that are large enough to put things in.

Cons:

  • Most sizing options currently only range from 4-14, although there are a few onesies for infants.
  • Because Girls Will Be is a small family-owned company and they produce their clothes here in the USA, the price point is a little higher than you will find at a large retail store. Right now the clothes range in price from $18-$34.

But, because Sharon over at Girls Will Be is so stinkin’ nice, she has offered all Binkies and Briefcases readers 10% off your purchases through 10/22. Just use the code BINKIES10 at checkout.

If you want to support small, family-owned business that manufacture their products in the USA and get some seriously adorable and modest options for your girls, definitely check out this company!

Girls Will Be clothing line

And don’t forget to hop over and like the Girls Will Be Facebook page.

Congratulations to Girls Will Be for receiving the first ever #ModestMavens stamp of approval!

Girls Will Be

My hope is to continue working with both large and small scale manufacturers to test clothing and offer honest feedback, so that when I tell you that something has been #ModestMaven approved and you see the dragonfly, you know my girls have tested it themselves and it passed with flying colors!

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Why I Care: Speaking About The Post That Called Out Target

October 10, 2014 By: Stephanie88 Comments

“Wow, That lady is crazy. She has way too much time on her hands.” 

“Of course the shorts should be cut differently, boys are just physically bigger than girls.” 

“Those clothes are cute while they are little, as long as they aren’t wearing them as teenagers.” 

“We would love to run your story on our show, but what exactly is the angle here?” 

“Oh, just shut up and shop somewhere else.”

“Well, what can we do? Sex sells.”  

“Who cares?” 

I care. I care a lot. 

I care because, with any luck, my kids will be adults for four times longer than they are children. 

I care because I am not raising girls; I am raising women. 

I care because my bible says that women are “clothed in strength and dignity” (Proverbs 31:25) and this? 

girls one inch inseam

This offers neither. 

I care because, in just one week, half a million other people told me they care too. 

half a million people liked this post

When I was doing the pre-interview for Good Morning America, I had a several phone conversations behind the scenes, as they tried to decide if the story was one they wanted to share. The producer of the segment asked me over the phone why this was a topic that was important, so I told her why. 

Because when I asked a college professor of Human Development if it was true that young boys are physically bigger than girls, she was able to point me to a college text book and the CDC growth charts that prove that this misconception is just is not true. Up to age 6, after age 9, and until adolescence, boys are actually not the physically larger sex. At least not in any way that would be considered practically significant.

Because there is a reason that you will never see Oprah Winfrey, Kate Middleton, Michelle Obama, or really any of the most wealthy and powerful women in the world wearing clothing like that. Go ahead, hop over to Forbes.com and tell me how many pictures you find of influential women wearing a 1″ inseam.

While you may find a few wealthy women in the entertainment industry to whom you can point, when has Hollywood ever proved itself to be a good moral compass?  

I care because the American Psychological Association has done an entire report on the sexualization of young girls. 

I care because it only takes 8 minutes to watch this video from the APA and see what young middle schooled-aged girls actually think of the clothes and advertising images being presented to them. 

I care because it has already been proven over and over again that less revealing clothing for children will sell. It was proven when Lolly Wolly Doodle was founded by one mom who started sewing her own clothes for her children, because the ones in the store weren’t appropriate. Five years later she is now the CEO of a $20 million business. 

It was proven when Girls Will Be had their Kickstarter campaign fully funded and ran out of inventory, and is still struggling just to keep up with demand. 

It is proven to me every time I walk into my local Target or Kohl’s or wherever and, although they do offer Bermuda length shorts, they are almost immediately sold out of those options in both of my daughters’ sizes. 

I care because when I went to Target.com to search for longer inseams, over and over I saw this: 

not sold in stores

and I thought about my former middle school students, the ones who live in a district where the poverty level is around 40%, the ones whose families often do not have internet access or credit cards for placing online orders. I thought about the families who sometimes don’t even have a shipping address to put in the line because they don’t know where they will be living next week. 

The kids who can’t afford to shop at the higher end stores that came up over and over again in my comments section. 

Again and again, a well-meaning mom would comment on that viral post, trying to offer a suggestion for an alternative place to find better quality clothes, and another mother would reply, “I love the look of those clothes! But we just can’t afford it.”

And I could just imagine the second mother’s shoulders slumping as she tried to figure out what she was going to have to cut from her grocery budget in order to afford just one pair of $25-$30 shorts for each of her children.

Over and over again, I received comments and emails from mothers who said things such as, “We own those shorts in your blog post, the ones with the daisies, but..”

“…our daughter wears bike shorts under them.”

“…I sewed on a ruffle at the bottom to add a few inches.”

“…we only wear them with a colorful pair of tights underneath.”

“…I bought two pairs when they were on sale. We used the extra fabric to make one longer pair.”   

“…they are only good for wearing underneath of skirts or dresses.” 

Mothers who are using their ingenuity to improve what is available to them. Mothers who do not necessarily want what is being offered to them, but bought it anyway because it was available and it was what they could afford. How does the retailer know what we did with it afterwards? All the sales report tells them is that they just sold some more very short shorts and a pair of bike shorts or a pair of tights. So mothers are feeling stuck, and retailers are thinking they are selling what we want. 

You say it is fine to teach our children to dress like adults? After all, this is America. I completely agree. What kind of adults do we want to dress them like? As for me, if I’m going to teach my girls to dress like adults, I’m going to teach them to dress like women who own real estate, have 401K’s, and life insurance. I’m going to teach them to dress like adults who own their own business or intend to run for Congress. 

I’m going to teach them to speak with their mouths and their written words instead of their bodies, because if I have learned anything from the experience of having that blog post become international news this week, it is that our words and our actions are even more powerful than our vaginas. And that, my friends, is very, very powerful. 

 

#ModestMavens

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Welcome to Binkies and Briefcases

October 8, 2014 By: Stephanie15 Comments

Thanks to the sudden and unexpected popularity of my latest post about how I’m attempting to get big retailers like Target to listen to the feedback parents are offering and change the clothes that are offered to our daughters, I have a lot of new visitors here this week. I am overwhelmed by all of your support, and would like to especially thank Good Morning America for running my story. 

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photo credit: Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

First of all, Welcome! I’m so glad you are here. I would love to have you join the community on my Facebook page so that I can get to know you better as well. There are almost 5 years worth of posts on this website to sort through. Since that can be a bit overwhelming, I wanted to offer you a quick post with links to all of my favorites. 

Here are a few of my favorite posts on Binkies and Briefcases:

1. The Road and The Light: Some of you may know that our son is adopted and has had more than his fair share of struggles. I wrote this post during one of the darkest times in our lives, but it is still one of my favorites because it reminds me that no matter what you are going through, there is always hope. You can read more of his story in my Adoption and Special Needs section. 

2. My grandmother’s Hot Milk Cake recipe– Now that she is gone, I treasure this recipe and make it almost every holiday. 

3. My Girl’s $0 Reading Nook: This is my favorite space in our house, and it was free.

4. Moms Are People Too– To be honest, I forgot I had written this post until it popped up again the other day. After re-reading it, I think it might help some other moms who may be struggling, like I did, with the transition into motherhood. 

Here is what you should know about me: 

Yes, I’m a momma who loves Jesus and lives in Amish country. I also love brownie batter, cheeseburgers, and Twilight movies (I know, that last one is sad. Please don’t run away.) I’m far from perfect and very willing to over-share those less than perfect moments with you. 

I advocate for adoption, love an acceptance of all people, and fight hard for social change. I also like to share light-hearted funny stories, family recipes, and crafts. So sometimes the blog bounces all over, but I try to focus on keeping my heart in the right place. If you are interested, you can read more in my About Me section. 

I hope you will stick around and take a little time to explore the blog!  I would love to connect with you on Facebook and hear what you have to say, too. 

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Cute and Modest Halloween Costume Ideas for Girls

October 5, 2014 By: Stephanie3 Comments

A collection of modest costumes for girls from baby to tween

deposit photo

 

I know some families feel differently, but our family does like to dress up and celebrate Halloween. Sometimes it can be hard to find appropriate costumes, especially for girls. I have heard from a lot of parents that this becomes more and more difficult as their daughters get older. For some reason, Halloween seems to be an especially difficult time to find full coverage in an outfit. That can be hard if you live in a cold climate, like we do, and you are just looking for something practical to dress your daughter in!

So, I’ve put together a list of some great cute and modest Halloween costumes for girls, all of which moms have created ourselves.

This Jellyfish costume from acasarella.net is adorable and looks pretty easy to make. All you need is some ribbon and a clear or white umbrella.

Check out these scarecrows, which were custom-made by a mom who embellished some regular old overalls. I found them through a feature on Costume Works.

I can’t even handle the cuteness of this owl costume from Martin.Family.Times. She has added instructions here.

I’m a little partial to this grumpy penguin, seeing as how she’s mine. It literally only takes 2 minutes to throw this no-sew infant costume together with a onesie and 2 pairs of tights. You can see my post about this costume here. Turn it into any animal you want with a pre-made hat purchased from the store. These animal hats have been all over the place for the past few years.

no sew pengiun costume

If you have a girl girl who is dreaming of being a princess this year, like I do, you can see how I made our homemade Elsa-inspired costume here.

Elsa costume from Disney's Frozen

In the past, Abby has also gone trick-or treating as Mary Poppins.

mary poppins

But I think that Make It and Love It really showed us up in the Mary Poppins department. Yes, that momma made those costumes! Click over to see her amazing costumes. Can you believe it?

For our tweens, this hashtag Halloween costume from  Capturing Joy with Kristen Duke made me giggle. #clever.

 

In the 6th grade I went to a Halloween dance dressed up like a phone, although a lot of people mistook me for a calculator. True story. #nerdalert.

I think Katniss is going to be a popular choice again this year, and I love this DIY costume from Simple As That.

 

What I love about all of these costumes is that not only are they really cute, but they offer full coverage, and none of them even require any make-up. But, and this is important, they also don’t make the girls feel disconnected from pop culture. We’re not asking anyone to dress up like Eleanor Roosevelt or Laura Ingalls Wilder (although I personally happen to think think those are awesome ideas!). We know it is 2014 and girls want to feel like they are on the same wavelength as their peers.

Also, I don’t know about you, but we live in Pennsylvania, where it is cold on Halloween. One year our family had a mermaid walking around with a scarf, hat, and gloves over her costume, and another year it actually snowed! Skimpy costumes, regardless of my personal philosophy,  just aren’t practical for trick-or-treating anyway.

I would love to hear some more of your ideas! Feel free to post pictures of your daughters in their Halloween costumes on my Facebook page. 

For more everyday options for adorable and modest clothes for girls and tweens, be sure to follow this Pinterest board:

Follow Stephanie {Binkies and Briefcases} ‘s board Cute and Modest Options for Girls on Pinterest.

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My Blog Post Went Viral and The Rest of This Week Kind of Sucked

October 4, 2014 By: Stephanie61 Comments

First, I just have to say, “Wow!” and “Thank you!”

Never in a million years did I expect my last post to get as much attention as it did. I am so happy to have been able to connect with so many other parents around the world. It has been amazing to hear from other moms, dads, teachers, and people of different faith backgrounds who have the very same concerns that I do. Literally hundreds of thousands of people have responded on social media. 

I think we have officially gone viral. My blog crashed 4 times from all of the traffic in the past 2 days and I had to upgrade to my own dedicated server. Then I had to upgrade to a bigger one. Hopefully that is all fixed now and you are able to get here without any more trouble.

The Huffington Post ran that piece and it got over a quarter of a million Facebook likes in less than 2 days. It made the front page of their Parents section. This doesn’t even count the response on my own blog or any of the other social media shares. My social media following tripled in 48 hours. We have started something big!

facebook likes on huffpost

I think it is so cool that as a conservative Christian mom I was so well received by what is typically considered a pretty liberal media outlet, and I have heard from other parents all around the world. Orthodox Jewish families and Muslim families wrote to me and said they had the same concerns about exposing their daughters to clothing they consider inappropriate. Families with values and beliefs much different than my own reached out to agree and say, “How can we help? We want this for our daughters too.” I heard from families in the UK, Canada, and Australia. National news programs have been emailing me. It has been pretty crazy, in a very good way!

I do want to clear up just a few misconceptions. First, I am not being paid to work with Target or any other retailers (Yet. Hey…if you want to pay me, that’s cool. I have three kids to feed.) and I am not the Yoda of the Moms Who Influence Kids’ Fashion World. Target has not promised to bend over backwards to do everything I say. Or really, anything I say. They have simply promised to allow me to collect responses from moms via social media and start some conversations with one of their designers. They are also allowing me to give them specific feedback on a selection of children’s clothing that is supposedly en route to my house. They did not ask me to write about anything I am doing for them, but I warned them that I will be writing about all of it because I’m a blogger. That’s kind of my thing. I think everyone is a little taken aback by how much this seems to be an area that is under-served in the children’s fashion industry.

I was very impressed that as soon as my first post calling out Target got on their radar, just a few days after it was published, they were the ones who reached out to me. Rather than just offer a generic apology and maybe a small gift card, like other retailers may have, they gave me a direct phone number to their PR team. They have answered and returned all of my personal phone calls. They have read the comments on my blog posts here and on The Huffington Post. They offered to send me samples and listened to my feedback and suggestions. I exchanged very long and detailed emails with their Public Relations team. They indulged me by explaining how their design process works. All of our interactions have been positive and civil and, frankly, really fun. I thought this was a HUGE step towards progress and really admire them for listening to our voices as concerned parents.

Second, I am in no way trying to gender neutralize all clothing. I happen to have two very girly girls. They don’t want to dress like boys and I don’t intend to make them. I just want to make it easier for parents to access modest, cute, and affordable clothing for their daughters. Our voices are coming together to tell retailers that there IS a market for more modest clothing. A big market, I’d say, based on the insane response to that last post.

That was the good part of this week. 

Then there was the bad part…the more personal stuff.

You may have noticed that I have not written much lately. True, I had taken a teaching position and gone back to work. (Are you wondering why I phrased that in the past tense? I will tell you.)

A few weeks ago, I started feeling very dizzy. I have suffered from vertigo before, so I thought that was the problem. Then it just kept getting worse. Then I noticed that I was starting to get black spots in my vision and I frequently felt like I was going to pass out.

I went to the doctor and was treated for what they thought might be an inner ear infection. Even on the medicine I was taking, it kept getting worse. A few days later, my hands and feet started going numb. I felt fine 95% of the time, but that other 5% was getting scary. I called my doctor’s office and they told me I had to go to the Emergency Room. 

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They ran blood, urine samples, an EKG, and a CT scan. They did all kinds of tests of my reflexes, but couldn’t find anything. They sent me home with stronger medicine, still thinking it was an inner ear issue. They told me to follow up with my family doctor, but I wasn’t allowed to work or drive while on the medicine or having those symptoms. Nobody wants their kid to be in a room with a teacher who is hopped up on pills and might black out at any second, after all.

I started keeping a journal of all my symptoms. After a lot of Googling and WebMD, I was pretty sure I might have Multiple Sclerosis, but I was also pretty sure I could just be being a hypochondriac. Maybe it was just stress or something?

My family doctor ordered a MRI.

I finally got those results back yesterday.

I do have a lesion in my brain. So, I wasn’t crazy, there really is something wrong. The good news is that it doesn’t look like cancer. The bad news is that they can’t tell what it is yet. My doctor said he would be surprised if it is MS since there is only one lesion, it could just be a bruise that is affecting my balance and vision. Maybe I hit my head super hard?  (I haven’t.) But I’m going to have to follow up with a neurologist because it could potentially be something more serious, such as the MS I initially thought.

In the meantime, I ran out of sick time and was not eligible for medical leave because I just started that teaching position in August. I could have applied for an unpaid leave, but that would have left my students without a permanent teacher, and I didn’t think that was fair to them. So I resigned from my teaching position yesterday for medical reasons.

I told you it has been a crazy week.

But isn’t it funny how when one door closes another one opens? Because at the very moment I was turning in my resignation, my blog was hitting its all-time high for page views and I was getting hundreds of emails from women saying, “Yes! Thank you for this. Someone needs to take up this cause for our daughters.” 

So…I guess that’s going to be me. Because here I am, back to being a full-time mom and blogger.

If you are here because you are one of the parents looking for more modest clothing options for your daughters, I have started a Pinterest board where I am collecting the suggestions that have been sent to me by other parents. Be sure to follow this board and I will be doing follow-up posts featuring companies that are already offering what we have been asking for.

Follow Stephanie {Binkies and Briefcases} ‘s board Cute and Modest Options for Girls on Pinterest. 

I’m so glad all of you are here to take this crazy ride with me!

I would love for us to start using the hashtag #ModestMavens when discussing this issue on social media so that I can keep track of our conversations and your suggestions!

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Dressing Our Daughters: How Target Responded to My Last Blog Post

October 1, 2014 By: Stephanie684 Comments

This mom went in to Target and measured the inseams on the shorts in the girls department and compared them to the boys. The results are really surprising!

It seems that my last blog post, A Target Intervention on Behalf of My Daughters, has struck a nerve. To my surprise, it got a lot of national attention. The Huffington Post ran it. It was featured on A Mighty Girl’s Facebook page, and it has been shared thousands of times in the past few days. Several of you have been asking if I have heard back from Target.

I have been in touch with the Target Corporate Headquarters and I am so excited to report that they have read all of the comments that moms are leaving in response to that post! I am beyond thrilled announce that I am going to start working with Target towards change, starting in my own house. They have asked me to provide them with some specific feedback about children’s clothes and I am going to start a behind the scenes partnership with them to get more of what moms and girls want into their stores. Thank you Target for hearing our voices and taking our concerns very seriously!

There was a lot of other discussion surrounding that post as well.

First, some people entirely missed the point. This response was my personal favorite:

Screenshot

Niiiiice.

I want to be very clear that I don’t care what the size label says on my daughters’ clothing. My concern was, in fact, that shorts being offered to our girls are just too short. Period. The end. And it extends to other articles of clothing as well.

All of my children happen to fall into the “average” range on the charts the doctors use, sometimes even being slightly underweight, not that it should matter. I realize all children are built differently. I’m not at all concerned with the numbers on the labels of their clothing, but as a consumer I feel that I have the right to speak out when I’m not being offered what I want. And what I want is appropriate clothes for my daughters.

Many discussions were started as a result of my first post about how we are sexualizing our girls too early and that the clothing industry is contributing to the problem. While I actually agree with that, my main concerns as a shopper right now are mostly practical.

Can my daughter sit “criss cross applesauce” on the reading rug? Does it meet the finger tip length dress code rule? Are those too tight for her to button herself after using the bathroom? What do I tell grandma when she asks what sizes the kids are wearing now so she can start Christmas shopping? And the obvious, is my daughter too exposed? We prefer to keep our private parts private around here, thank you very much. 

After speaking with Target and reading several of your responses, I realized that it may have been a mistake to use toddler sizes in my first post. Yes, it is true that up to size 3T allows for the additional girth of a diaper.

Also, it may have been a little unfair to use the Fisher Price pants as a comparison because those are older hand-me-downs and no longer available on the market.

Some people also wanted me to focus on the fit of boys’ clothing as compared to girls’. Others wanted me to call out other stores besides Target. So, hold on to you hats and grab a drink, because this may take a while, but don’t worry because there will be a lot of pictures. 

Target

I went back to Target today with my daughter and our teenage babysitter, Lindsay, after my discussion with them. I wanted to take pictures to document the current state of the clothes in their children’s and juniors’ departments so that I can look back in a few months and see how much of a difference our voices have made. Hopefully we will see a lot of change very soon. This is what I found today:

Since I was told it would be better to compare children’s sizes instead of toddlers, I focused on a size XS (4-5).

same size shorts, girls v boys

Do you see something wrong here? These are shorts for 4-year-olds.

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This is a pair of girls’ XS Cherokee jean shorts. I measured the inseam. It was 1 inch.

girls one inch inseam

This is a pair of Shaun White shorts for boys in the same size, XS. (I tried to find the same Cherokee brand for boys, but since it is October, pickings were slim in the shorts department.) The inseam on the same sized shorts in the boys’ department was almost 7 times longer.

7 inch inseam

A lot of commenters on my last post simply said, “Who cares, just buy a bigger size.” I was curious how high I would need to go up in sizes in the girl’s department until I found a pair of shorts that matched the length of the boys’.

You said jump (up in sizes), I said how high? Turns out, it’s this high:

boys v girls clothes

Those are the same boys XS (4-5) Shaun White shorts on the left. The only shorts in the girls’ department that matched them for length were a girls’ size Large (10-12). I had to go for athletic shorts because they didn’t make any denim shorts for girls with an inseam this long.

The problem, besides the fact that we are calling the same amount of fabric Large for girls and Extra Small for boys, is that those size Large shorts would never fit my 5-year-old daughter in the waist. So even if I tried to buy her a bigger size, they wouldn’t fit.

Let’s move on and compare some of the same brands, though. Please excuse my less than stellar phone pictures.

On the left, boys’ size 5 boot cut Cherokee jeans. On the right, the boot cut for girls in the same size. 

cheroke boys v girls

bootcut jean boys v girls

Yes, the girls’ jeans in the same size, in the same brand, are tighter and shorter.

The same thing happens with shirts. Girls’ on the left, boys’ on the right.

10445987_10203831662087144_1640650068595530267_n

girls shirts on top of boys shirt for size comparisson

These shirts are labeled the same size. I have no idea why an XS shirt (size 4-5) needs to curve like that to show the shape of a young girl’s body, a body that hasn’t even developed the curves that a woman’s shirt in that same cut would be trying to feature.

However, I did see some things in Target today that made me smile.

First of all, they had super heroes and Ninja Turtles in the girls’ and juniors’ sections. And a lot of the shirts weren’t even pink. 🙂

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They also had a lot of Frozen character items that were not entirely pink or purple or glittery (although there was a lot of that too). The “princess culture” stuff doesn’t bother me. As a matter of fact, I just made my daughter an Elsa dress that will be her Halloween costume. My girls are obsessed with Frozen just as much as any others. I also saw some pink in the boys’ and men’s sections. FYI- Target also had Frozen shirts for boys.

10622812_10203831655166971_2222046306636648926_n  10703550_10203831661047118_4149595749428350244_n 10704086_10203831662047143_985236595484623055_n

While we were at Target we also stopped by the women’s and junior’s department to measure the inseam on the shorts over there.

Um…

women's size 7 shorts

Not quite 2 inches on a women’s size 7. Let me remind you that this is less than one inch longer than the shorts intended for toddlers.

Ouch.

Moving on…

Lest anyone think I am specifically picking on Target (which I am, because they are and always will be my favorite and I hold them to high standards), we also went to Kohl’s.

And this is the part where I feel the need to formally apologize to Target because in my experience today Kohl’s was worse.

If we want to crown a winner of gender stereotyping the clothes in the children’s department, Kohl’s won by a landslide. It was pretty bad.

Guess how many super hero or comic book character shirts I found in the girls’ department there. Zero. The boy’s department was full of them, though.

gender stereotyping in kohls

While we were at Kohl’s, I did get the opportunity to compare several name brands of shorts.

Remember how there was some debate about how it isn’t fair to compare different brands because they all cut their clothes differently?

Well, it turns out that Oshkosh and Lee have the same idea of what a size 4 should look like for a boy.

comparing boys shorts

But Mudd is a little confused about how much fabric is necessary to make that same size for a girl.

Comparing brands of shorts

Once again, I’d like to remind everyone that these are clothes for preschoolers.

Girls’ vs. Boys’

Girls' shorts are getting too short

It’s a scary world out there, trying to shop for our daughters.

Yes, I suppose I could start buying clothes from the boys’ section, but why should I have to? I happen to have girls who actually like pink and purple and sparkles. They deserve better than what we are giving them.

And no, it is not about shorter clothes costing less money to manufacture. The clothes in the boys’ section don’t cost twice as much, although they have more fabric.

And no, it is not about me “slut shaming” young girls as a writer, because a) gross and b) there is no such thing as a 4-year-old slut and c) little girls just want to be able to play comfortably in their clothes. I’ve heard from a lot of people this week. Not one of them was a preschooler who felt “slut shamed” by my last post.

And no, it is not a quality control issue or because the clothes are designed to fit smaller Asian children (which is an actual response I got this week from a commenter). I spoke to Target’s Public Relation’s team. I heard straight from the source that their clothes, while perhaps manufactured elsewhere (I didn’t ask), are designed right here in the US by not one, but two teams of designers. One team focuses on the look of the clothes, while the other focuses on fit. They use statistical data from kids right here and try to fit their clothes to the 50% percentile, doing the best they can to meet in the middle and fit as many kids as they can.

No matter what, there is no excuse for trying to sell me a one inch inseam. Ever. They literally make underwear with longer inseams than that.

The good news is that Target is listening to us. They want to know what moms and dads are looking for when we purchase clothes for our kids. They heard us and they recognize that there is a problem. And they have promised to start working with me to fix it!

I hope this post cleared up any confusion you had about what I was saying in my last post. I am not now and will never be ashamed of my daughters’ bodies. 

I just want stores to sell some freaking longer shorts.

 

I would love for us to start using the hashtag #ModestMavens when discussing this issue on social media so that I can keep track of our conversations and your suggestions!

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A Target Intervention on Behalf of My Daughters

September 20, 2014 By: Stephanie496 Comments

UPDATE: I have heard back from Target and they are listening to us, please see my latest post on this topic here.

Dear Target,

I think you know I love you. (Enough even to commit the cardinal sin of blogging, the dreaded open letter.) We go way back, you and me, as my bank statements can attest. I will go out of my way and drive further across town to shop at your store over your biggest competitor because you are cleaner, less crowded, and you give my kids free popcorn for being buckled safely into the cart. Also, the last time I stepped foot in your competitor’s store, one of their employees was casually using the f-word in conversation with a customer in the children’s department, which was more than a little off-putting. I know that I can trust you not to allow that sort of thing to happen.

You’ll always be my first choice. But you have a problem, and for too long I have allowed my checkbook to make me an enabler. The worst part is that my children are involved in this cycle. It stops now. This is an intervention for your own good.

You sell clothing for children, right? Rhetorical question. My friends and I buy a lot of it. We are your target (pun intended) audience, and I’m here today to tell you that what I’m about to say is important to all of us.

You are making our daughters’ clothes wrong.

I’m  sure you already know this, but your size 5T shorts are actually smaller than many size 2T shorts made by other brands.

Why are you offering my kindergartener clothes that are sized for children less than half her age?

Honestly, these are your Cherokee jean shorts in a size 5T. When I hold them up next to a set of Fisher Price shorts in a size 2T, guess which ones are longer? 

photo_3(12)

C’mon guys, you can do better than that.

What’s that? Why do I even own these size 5T shorts? Well, sometimes my ultra slim kindergartener wears them underneath her dresses for playground modesty, but mostly we own them because they fit her little sister perfectly. Since, you know, this one is currently in that awkward space between a size 24months and moving into the T sizes.

photo_1(14)

I’d like you to meet my youngest daughter. She is 2 and a half, weighs approximately 25 pounds and had consistently been in the “average” range on all of the doctor’s charts, hovering around the 50% percentile. 

There is no reason my toddler should fit in these shorts, but she does. She fits into quite a bit of your other size 5T clothing as well, so I know it wasn’t just a mistake with this particular pair of shorts. Don’t you dare try that with me.

Every time the grandparents ask what size her sister is wearing so that they can spend their money at your store as well, I wind up passing down some brand new, too short for their label hand-me-downs to my smallest child.

Because you are manufacturing your girls’ clothing WAY too small.

I took this picture last summer, when I was irritated because the crotch was the longest part of every single pair of shorts offered in the toddler section of your store.

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I asked other moms on my Facebook page if they were as irritated by this as I was, and it was immediately greeted with similar feedback from other moms who are not happy with this situation either.

So, can we do something about this please?

Because all we want to do is continue spending money at your store without exposing our daughters’ precious assets.

Thanks!

Sincerely,

A concerned mom who likes to shop.

 

UPDATE: I would love for us to start using the hashtag #ModestMavens when discussing this issue on social media so that I can keep track of our conversations and your suggestions!

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I’ll Be Back

August 7, 2014 By: Stephanie4 Comments

Yes, that was a terrible Schwarzenegger impression, in case you were wondering.

I’m just popping in to let you know that I will be taking a little break room the blog. I’m sure I will be back soon. I love blogging and the community I have been able to be part of for the past four and a half  years. But this is a big transitional time for our family. After almost six years at home full-time with my kiddos, I have accepted a teaching position. I am going back into the classroom and will be teaching 6th grade in an urban public school.

It’s a big change and right now it is taking a lot of my time to prepare my classroom, myself, and my kids for this transition, so the blog needs to take a back seat for at least a few weeks. Thanks for understanding!

Love,

Steph

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Giveaway: $50 Walmart Gift Card from Boogie Wipes

August 6, 2014 By: Stephaniecomment

Do you shop at Walmart? I don’t do much shopping there, to be honest, but I certainly would if I had a $50 gift card! I know some of you do a lot of your shopping at the Smiley Face, so when I was offered the opportunity to giveaway a Walmart gift card from Boogie Wipes I jumped on it. Today is my day, but for 8 weeks this summer different bloggers will be posting about the giveaway. All you have to do is follow us for more chances to win. How easy is that? Then every week Boogie Wipes will choose a new winner.

In celebration of Great Grape Boogie Wipes being sold at Walmart, I’m teaming up with Boogie Wipes to offer the Great Grape Summer Giveaway!

It's a Great Grape Summer celebration! Enter to Win a $50 Walmart gift card and a Boogie Wipes prize pack. One winner each week for the next 8 weeks. Enter now!

One winner will be drawn each week for the next eight weeks and will receive a $50 Walmart gift card and a Boogie Wipes prize pack.

How to Enter

From following some of our favorite bloggers on social media to instagramming a picture of your Great Grape purchase at Walmart, there are dozens of ways to enter – and a few ways to enter every single day.

Check back throughout the next eight weeks to enter again and see if you won!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Want to have more fun this summer?

Visit the Boogie Wipes blog for all sorts of summer fun ideas – including Sidewalk Chalk Recipes, Crafts and Games to Play with Pool Noodles and DIY Board Games (for when it rains).

Good luck!

Giveaway is live Tuesday, July 8, 2014 until midnight on Tuesday, September 2, 2014. US and Canada residents only. One winner will be chosen each week and will be notified via email. YOUR BLOG NAME received no compensation for sponsoring this event, and is not responsible for the delivery of the prize. Prize delivery is the sole responsibility of Boogie Wipes.

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How to get FREE Popcorn at Target for your Kids

July 29, 2014 By: Stephanie3 Comments

How to Get FREE Popcorn at Target:

Did you know that some Target stores give kids a free bag of popcorn just for following a certain safety rule? Me neither. Until today, that is. Guess what? You’re probably already following that rule.

classic box of popcorn isolated on white

This morning I was at Target dropping a ridiculous amount of cash on back to school clothes, diapers, dog food…the usual. We got a very nice cashier who offered stickers to the kids. You know, the red ones with the picture of the dog on them that the kids get for being buckled in the shopping cart correctly? Those. THEN he told us that the kids could show them at the food counter and get a free bag of popcorn. SAY WHAT?! We’ve gotten the stickers before, but this news about the popcorn was new.

Yep. I took them over to the food counter and they each got their own free bag. Three free bags of popcorn!

 My friend Sara has since told me that she knew about this little secret and she would save a sticker for the next store visit, so that she can get a free bag of popcorn at the beginning of her trip and the kids can snack while she shops. Um…genius, that is.

When we got home I called Target’s corporate hotline to inquire if your stores would do it too, and I was told that this policy varies by store. So some stores might not participate, but it never hurts to ask! The next time you are at Target, buckle up your kids, get some stickers, and ask if they equal free popcorn in your neck of the woods.

 

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Welcome! I’m Steph.

This is a little corner of the internet we like to fill with honesty, heart, and humor. Read More…

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Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese

Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese

Stephanie Giese is an indie author based in Florida. She writes stories about realistic problems with humor, heart, and sass. Her work has a strong focus on mental health and consent. Her North Bay small-town romance series is set for release in 2025.

Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese

3 months ago

Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese
I know it’s a small thing, but I believe small things can add up to big changes. my entire North Bay series, including Out of Left Field, Right as Rain, and Way Off Base, is free on Kindle from Jan. 30-Feb. 3. Please take the funds you might have spent on my books this week and reallocate them toward the areas in our country that need them the most. Follow creators like Dad Chats who can direct you toward practical needs local to them. I hope my quirky romcoms can bring you some comfort and joy during difficult times, and I hope together we can take small, practical steps toward big changes. ... See MoreSee Less

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Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese

3 months ago

Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese
I know there is an overall feeling of helplessness in our country right now. So many of us are at a loss for what to do beyond making phone calls and social media posts (which are still important, but can feel like not enough). I believe strongly in the power of small things adding up to big ones. As one person, I might not be able to do much, but what I CAN do is use my voice and my books to work toward the change I’d like to see. That’s why, for the next five days, from Jan. 30-Feb 3, I’m making the Kindle versions of my entire North Bay series (Out of Left Field, Right as Rain, and Way Off Base) completely free. Art has power, and I do hope these comedies can bring you some comfort and joy in difficult times, but most importantly, I also hope you’ll consider redirecting the funds you might’ve spent on my books and donating instead to one of the many charities working tirelessly in our cities right now. If you are located in an area like Minnesota or Portland, please use the space below to make people aware of the organizations in your area that need help. ... See MoreSee Less
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