Remember that exciting family news I told you I’d share in a few weeks? We’re pregnant! We were so NOT trying to conceive, but it’s a happy (and slightly terrifying) surprise.

So things have been a little off-kilter around here. Eddie started a new job and is hardly ever around during the week. Two toddlers and a pregnant lady make for an interesting team. I feel like a bi-polar mom lately. One day I will take the kid’s berry picking and can my own homemade jam, the next day I have no intention of getting anyone out of their pajamas. There is no middle ground. I’m either in Super Martha Mommy mode or a top contender for Worst Mom Ever. Some days I can achieve both on the same day.

Today, for example, started out with me turning on the sprinkler for the kids to run through in the back yard, coming in for lunch and homemade rice Krispie treats, getting both kids to nap at the same time (!), Nick using the potty (!!!) and taking the kids to the neighborhood playground after their nap.

I was all I’m totally awesome at this, we are so going to be fine adding another one.

Then I burnt out after learning there had been a mistake with our new insurance and trying to make the phone calls to fix it. By the end of the day, my kids had watched 3 full-length movies and I was yelling irrationally and driving to McDonald’s, willing myself not to puke, not wearing a bra, and in my 13-year-old cheerleading t-shirt from high school with two barefoot, screaming kids. I might have eaten a BigMac and a McChicken sandwich. (And cursed the universe for not allowing me to eat honey. Stupid no unpasteurized foods rule. French fries dipped in honey are amazing and it is totally unfair to take them away from me right now.)

Then I was all I totally suck at this, what the heck were we thinking?

But then we came home and when the kids sat down to eat their nasty, processed chicken nuggets and french fries they both reminded me, separately, that we couldn’t eat before we said our prayers. So right now I’m leaning toward fairly confident in our ability to handle a third without messing him/her up too badly.

We’ll see.