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My First Book Signing!

April 22, 2013 By: Stephanie8 Comments

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Last Thursday I had the amazing opportunity to travel to Philadelphia and attend a book signing as one of the authors of the new book I Just Want to Pee Alone.

Pee alone

My husband took the entire day off from work so that I could have a chance to get ready in peace and head out early to beat some of the city traffic.

I drove to meet Meredith from The Mom of the Year at her house.  We have been online friends for about a year, but it was the first time we met in person. She was super brave (and maybe a little crazy) to trust me with her address. I even got to meet her kids and her sweet husband brought us some sandwiches from Subway for a quick dinner before we had to leave. Meredith’s sister, Adrienne,  also came with us to help us navigate, be our photographer, and calm our nerves.

There was a crazy amount of traffic driving into the city for our book signing, but Meredith did a great job not having a panic attack at the wheel and we made it with just minutes to spare. (Yes. We had never met before, but she gave me her address and I got in her minivan. That’s what blog friends do.) We even got an amazing parking space right outside of the store.   We were meeting Bethany from I Love Them the Most When They’re Sleeping, another one of the authors in the book, for the first time also. Bethany had organized the whole event at an adorable women’s active wear boutique called Indigo Schuy (pronounced “Sky”).

That’s Bethany on the left,  me in the middle, and Meredith on the right.

book signing

The store really went all-out for our event. They had a masseuse doing free massages for the women who were waiting, a giant cake with the picture of the book and our names on it, and champagne. It was hopping the entire time, mostly due to the fact that Bethany seems to be one of the most popular people in the universe. Almost every person who came was connected to her in some way.

Our pens were busy for hours!

book signing2

It was so strange to actually have people standing in line waiting for our autographs. On the car ride there Meredith and I were a little worried that no one would show up, but it was packed!

We didn’t even have time to eat any of this awesome cake. Seriously, have you ever seen such a lovely toilet cake? As Bethany said, “The gold icing really classes it up.”

book signing 3

We sold and signed a bunch of books, met a lot of new friends, and had a great time!

I had a long drive back, so I didn’t get home until almost 1am, and then Penny was up before 5. She did not get the memo that her famous mom (ha! yeah right) was out signing autographs until the wee hours of the morning and needed more beauty rest.

More book signings are in the works with our co-authors all across the country. If there is one in your area be sure to check it out. They are a ton of fun!

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The Scariest Moment

April 18, 2013 By: Stephanie3 Comments

I don’t like to talk about this, but I have a nagging feeling that has been weighing on my heart. It is a familiar feeling, the one that means someone needs to read my story. It is the very reason why I write. This goes out to whoever you are…

I believe that after I delivered my middle daughter I had a mild case of postpartum depression. I was able to get by and I thought I was just having trouble adjusting to my new role as a stay-at-home mom. I thought that tired and a little sad was the new me and I would begin to feel lighter as my kids grew up and life became less mundane.

My experience with postpartum depression

That being said, I was excited to discover we were expecting another baby. Somehow I felt like being pregnant and then having a newborn gave my life a new sense of direction and purpose. It was strange, but as soon as she came I started to feel like my old self again. I was more comfortable with my body, more confident in my role at home as a mom of three, and just an all-around happier person.  She was such a good, easy-going baby.

penny smiles

That is why I was shocked and terrified the day it happened.

The worst thought (or maybe second worst) that you can ever have as a mom, it invaded my brain like a parasite.

I was sitting there on the couch, watching Toy Story with my kids. I had just gotten off the phone with my husband, who was calling to tell me he was on his way home from work. It was just one thought, but it was scary and strange because it remains to this day the only thought that I have ever had that seemed as if it was planted by an outside source.

Like the scene in the movie Anchorman where Ron Burgundy is fired for reading inappropriate words from the teleprompter, it was as though someone else had written the thought and planted it inside my head. Only in my version, there was no comic relief.  I had no choice but to say the awful phrase because it was on the screen.

“Good. He’s on the way. That means if I kill myself now the kids won’t be unsupervised for long.”

The thought that immediately followed was WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!!!

It was the single most terrifying moment of my entire life. I was alone with 3 very small children and I honestly thought I might be going insane. Is this what crazy people mean when they say they hear voices in their head telling them to do things? Could I trust myself to be here with my kids for the next 40 minutes?

I knew I SHOULD call the doctor or some hotline or even 911, but I froze because I was terrified that my children would be taken away. The reports we have say that our son was removed from his birth mother because she was afraid that she was going to hurt herself and she couldn’t handle the pressure of being a mom. I didn’t want to risk him losing another family.

Besides, I didn’t actually want to hurt myself. I have NEVER actually contemplated suicide, I wasn’t thinking about ways to do it, I wasn’t writing notes, I didn’t want to do it at all. I loved our new family and my new life. It was just so strange that the thought entered my mind, completely uninvited.

I called my mom, who is a licensed therapist. She told me that what I was describing was called an intrusive thought and asked if I was on any new medication.

As a matter of fact, I was. The doctor had just written me a prescription for progestin-only birth control pills at my 6 week check up because I was nursing. I made my mom stay on the phone with me and I Googled side effects (which I should have known about before I started taking a new medication).  Sure enough, I saw, “In rare cases, less-common side effects can include depression and/or suicidal thoughts.”

Stupid little pills.

Needless to say, I stopped taking them immediately.

That is not to say that medication is bad, because it is not. If you feel like you may be experiencing depression or anxiety, by all means, speak to your doctor right away. Antidepressants and anti-anxiety medication are sometimes very necessary. In my case, though, it turned out that the medicine I was taking (which, just to be extra clear, was your average run of the mill birth control)  was causing much more harm than good.

I have not been on any medication for over a year now and this is honestly this is the best I have felt in my entire career as a mother. It is much easier to take care of me and find humor in the everyday. I feel like myself again.

Whether your story is similar to mine or exactly the opposite, I want you to know that you are not alone. There is a whole community of moms blogging to share their stories so that you know that we are right here in the trenches with you. That is lesson number one.

Lesson number two is that having a house full of three children ages 4 and under and a temporarily suicidal wife who is no longer allowed to be on birth control is the fastest way to get a man to volunteer for a vasectomy. True story.

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Imperfect: The Day I Forgot My Kid

April 16, 2013 By: Stephanie8 Comments

This is for you, yes you over there sitting on the couch in unwashed sweat pants and giving your kids cereal for dinner for the second night in a row.

You’re a good mom. They won’t remember the cereal. They won’t remember that you yelled when they spilled it. They won’t remember what you were wearing today.

You don’t have to be perfect to be good at this.

As a matter of fact, perfect and parenthood have kind of an inverse relationship. If you are a perfectionist I’m sorry to burst your bubble, but you probably aren’t very good at the parenting and if you are a really awesome mom you probably aren’t so worried about the perfect. (Have you ever heard Alexis Stewart, Martha’s daughter, talk about her childhood? It’s sad and uncomfortable.)

My middle daughter is turning 4 this weekend. Sure I could head over to Pinterest and plan a perfect party with a super cute theme and stress out and yell at her to not touch the rainbow cupcakes I spent 3 hours perfecting, but I’m not doing that this year. We are going to work together and bake cupcakes in ice cream cones because I told her those were my favorite when I was little and she wanted to do it too. They will look terrible and taste amazing. Then we will give her the toy we bought from the Disney store and she will be happy and we will call it good enough.

Because THAT is where perfection lies, in the land of Good Enough.

Case in point, you wouldn’t know it from the time stamp, but this picture was actually taken on Easter 2013.

easter

We’re all doing okay.

Friday was a pretty rough day for our little family, for example, but it was good enough to be quite a memory maker.

Eddie was off from work and we were going to drive up to the land where we are building our house. Construction was scheduled to start and we wanted to see the progress. Of course it was pouring down rain, so we weren’t even sure the work would get done.

We dropped Nicholas off at school and drove over an hour to a different state. Our car needed to be serviced, so we dropped it off and took the girls out to brunch at a nearby diner. Eddie was also hoping to get vaccinated for a mission trip he will be going on in a few weeks.

After brunch the car still wasn’t finished, so we walked to the dollar store and let Abby pick out some princess themed plates and napkins and a balloon for her upcoming birthday.

The car still wasn’t finished. We walked down the street to the tractor supply store to look at the baby chicks and ducks and pick up some oil for our riding mower. Abby was playing with the handle of a wagon and somehow managed to hit herself in the face, getting a big gash under her eye. Don’t worry, she is fine. She said it didn’t hurt as much as it seemed like it should have and actually didn’t even cry.

This is the part where I share with you that I forgot to pick up my son from school. It was around 12:30.  “Nicholas is in the office. Today was a half day. Please come and pick him up.”

Ummmm…sure thing. Oops. Except we are an hour and a half away from the school and don’t have access to our car at the moment. If you ever want to look like a REALLY bad mom, just go out in public with a child who looks like she has a black eye, hold a crying baby, and snap back and forth with your husband about whose fault it is that your other child has been forgotten.

Thank God my mom didn’t have to be at work for a few more hours and she was able to get to him in about 15 minutes and take him to my in-laws.

“We’ll be there as soon as we can.”

Except the car STILL wasn’t finished.

So I found myself changing Penny’s diaper on the dirty floor of a public restroom while we waited. For another hour and a half.

Eddie discovered that he wouldn’t be able to get an appointment for the vaccinations until the following week.

We eventually were able to get the car back and drive by the land on our way to get Nicholas and the work that had been scheduled WAS done. Yay. One piece of good news!

Later we left the kids with my mom  (again. poor mom.) and went to IKEA to place the order for our kitchen cabinets. (Remember when I was trying to decide? We’re going for it.)

We were there for 2.5 hours and couldn’t place the order because the storms had taken out their online ordering system. Eventually the store closed and at 9:30 Eddie and I found ourselves running through a Chick Fil A drive thru because we still hadn’t eaten. They got our order wrong.

Sometimes all you can do is laugh. Do I feel bad about not getting Nicholas?

Not really.

My mom told me that when she went to get him there were at least 20 other kids in the office. The school hadn’t put the half day on the calendar they send home for the month. I wasn’t the only mom who had absolutely no idea.

Nobody’s perfect.

easter 2

 

If you want more stories from moms encouraging each other by airing our imperfections, check out our new book, I Just Want to Pee Alone.

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Welcome! I’m Steph.

This is a little corner of the internet we like to fill with honesty, heart, and humor. Read More…

Cover for Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese
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Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese

Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese

Stephanie Giese is an indie author based in Florida. She writes stories about realistic problems with humor, heart, and sass. Her work has a strong focus on mental health and consent. Her North Bay small-town romance series is set for release in 2025.

Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese

3 months ago

Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese
I know it’s a small thing, but I believe small things can add up to big changes. my entire North Bay series, including Out of Left Field, Right as Rain, and Way Off Base, is free on Kindle from Jan. 30-Feb. 3. Please take the funds you might have spent on my books this week and reallocate them toward the areas in our country that need them the most. Follow creators like Dad Chats who can direct you toward practical needs local to them. I hope my quirky romcoms can bring you some comfort and joy during difficult times, and I hope together we can take small, practical steps toward big changes. ... See MoreSee Less

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Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese

3 months ago

Binkies and Briefcases with Stephanie Giese
I know there is an overall feeling of helplessness in our country right now. So many of us are at a loss for what to do beyond making phone calls and social media posts (which are still important, but can feel like not enough). I believe strongly in the power of small things adding up to big ones. As one person, I might not be able to do much, but what I CAN do is use my voice and my books to work toward the change I’d like to see. That’s why, for the next five days, from Jan. 30-Feb 3, I’m making the Kindle versions of my entire North Bay series (Out of Left Field, Right as Rain, and Way Off Base) completely free. Art has power, and I do hope these comedies can bring you some comfort and joy in difficult times, but most importantly, I also hope you’ll consider redirecting the funds you might’ve spent on my books and donating instead to one of the many charities working tirelessly in our cities right now. If you are located in an area like Minnesota or Portland, please use the space below to make people aware of the organizations in your area that need help. ... See MoreSee Less
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