“Don’t you think maybe you should punish him for that?”
“No.”
“Ok, but he just threw a bowl of hot soup across the room during a screaming temper tantrum for no reason.”
“Yeah. I know.”
Actually, there was a reason. A dumb reason. Dinner being ready meant we had to pause the Veggie Tales movie.
My brother is staying with us this week. He’s 15 and a really good kid, but he doesn’t get Nicholas’ condition. I don’t blame him, it’s hard to understand why a kid wouldn’t be punished for throwing soup across the room, or kicking his pregnant mother in the stomach on purpose, or sneaking out of his room while everyone’s asleep and climbing up on the kitchen countertops and throwing all the “out of reach” stuff all over the kitchen floor.
I tried explaining it, the 11 (eleven!) specialists, the fact that he is just different and the way we need to parent him is backward of common sense. The comments come. From my brother, from other well-meaning relatives, from strangers…
“You need to do _____, then he’ll learn.”
You need to SHUT UP.
I did everything. I do everything.
Yes, I know he’s 4 and not potty trained. I’m the one home all day changing the huge diapers, thanks.
Yes, I know he should get more sleep. We’re the ones up 4 times every night with him and his ridiculous demands, thanks.
Yes, I tried the gluten-free diet and supplements and no red dye and blah, blah, blah, thanks.
Yes, I know how a child “should” be disciplined. I have a Master’s Degree in education, a specialist certificate, certification in two states, and I am employed as a professional parenting specialist. Want to see my badge?
Mostly, I write this just to vent, but also to beg you to please, please, please keep your parenting advice to yourself unless you fully understand and appreciate a situation.
Do not make any snide remarks (or even “helpful” ones for that matter) to the mom with the bratty kids in line at Target.
Because it might be me, and if it is you will go home headless and I will need to buy more dental floss to get your b**** a*** neck skin out of my teeth.
And the Target brand dental floss is crap, so it’s really best all around if you just keep it to yourself.
You are a great mom, and we do understand what you deal with day in and day out. We love your child and he made us smile each day that we saw him in school. I look forward to having him back in school because he is a breath of fresh air as he always takes time out of his day to greet me walking down the hall and when leaving school:) Thanks for sharing and know that we care!