I did not watch 90% of the Oscar broadcast last night because I had better things to do. There were zombies to be killed over on The Walking Dead. It was an entire episode about Daryl! Who freakin cares about the Oscars?
So, I thought it would be fun today to do my own Walking Dead Zombie Oscars.
First, there would be a red (because, you know, blood) carpet show with my boyfriend Chris Hardwick, the host of Talking Dead.
Then, the awards go to…
Lifetime Achievement
Hershel. We miss you, man. You were good people.
We’re glad you’re gone
Laurie. You were a selfish brat and a terrible mother. It’s the apocalypse, watch your kid and stop sleeping with your husband’s psycho friend.
Best zombie fighter
Daryl. Maybe Daryl should just win everything.
Best Use of a crossbow
Daryl.
Most in need of a girlfriend
Daryl. C’mon writers, poor dude needs to find love at least once in his sucky life before everybody bites it. (See what I did there?)
Person I’d most want to be trapped in a trunk with
Daryl. (Daryl will you marry me? I don’t think my husband would mind.)
Way to Keep Romance Alive
Glen and Maggie. If one of you dies before you find each other again I’m going to be so mad.
Most Likely to Die
Rick. Ok, maybe not MOST likely, but I’ve kind of lost sympathy for you and you’re not in good shape, man.
Most likely to not actually be a killer
Carol. I’m 95% sure Lizzie killed Tyreese’s girlfriend. Carol gave Lizzie her knife right before that happened.
Creepiest little girl
Lizzie. You’re weird.
Most likely to not be who he says he is
The new “scientist” with the mullet
Grossest Kill
Baby pigs.
My predictions:
-The worms that were in the garden have something to do with the new bloody eyeball disease
-Lizzie tries to kill Judith, they all realize she killed Tyrese’s girlfriend, Tyreese goes nuts, Carol kills Tyreese.
-Beth and Daryl hook up. Beth dies.
Do you have any crazy predictions to add to the list? Awards you’d like to give?
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I think I”m missing out by not watching The Walking Dead!
You are. For sure. I’m not usually into zombie stuff at all, but the writing and character development is fabulous. You have to go back and watch from the very beginning, though, or you will be completely lost.
I didn’t watch the Oscars either. Those people pat themselves on the back way too much. However, I don’t watch the Walking Dead. You have peaked my curiosity. I might have to look it up. Is it on Netflix? This was way fun to read.