These Boobs Are Nothing But Trouble

So, first off, let me just say that I’m sorry that the last few posts have been pretty negative, but this one isn’t going to be much different. On the up side, there has been a lot more traffic at the toy library lately and I still have the best husband ever, who has gotten even more amazing after watching the movie Fireproof the other day. And my kids are pretty awesome too, so for those things I am very grateful.

However, today totally sucked! First, let me back up an entire year to when I was about 8 months pregnant with Abby. (Warning: if you are a man or squeamish woman you probably want to stop right here.) At that time I found a very small lump in my left breast, like a tiny pebble, that everyone thought was a clogged milk duct. After I delivered her it went away. Fine.

Fine, that is, until a few weeks ago when I started getting this weird dull achy pain in the same spot where the lump had been. Then the pain started radiating down my shoulder and upper arm and there was a little bit of (WARNING again) milky discharge. Also, since the delivery that breast has been significantly larger than the other. Finally, I got worried and made an appointment with the doctor. Today was the day of the appointment.

Luckily, my mom is on her spring break so she was able to stay with the kids while I went to the doctor. (By now you’ve probably ascertained that this did not go so well.) She could feel dense tissue and “something palpable” in the area I was talking about as well as one other area. She also told me I need to lose 20-30 pounds to get back to my pre-baby weight. She said I’m no longer allowed to eat bread, rice, pasta, corn, potatoes, or peas. Or caffeine! OR CHOCOLATE! Also I have to exercise at least 30 minutes a day. She told me she was sending me for an ultrasound and possible mammogram, which might need to be followed up with a consultation with a beast surgeon. She also gave me a prescription for vitamin E and a slip for blood work. Oh, and I had a pap smear, which as you know (since by now supposedly no men or squeamish women are reading this) is not the most pleasant thing in the world.

So I had to call Eddie and tell him to take the afternoon off to stay with the kids. Kirsten took over at the toy library and my mom went with me to the women’s imaging center. I have to say everyone on staff at Apple Hill was amazing. They were very warm, friendly, and positive. A young ultrasound tech named Autumn took the images and warned me they’d probably need to do a mammogram, which they did. (How many people can I get naked in front of in one day?) Then we had to go wait again so I could have several vials of blood drawn. I should probably mention at some point that this is all highly unusual because I’m only 25.

Well, thankfully, neither the ultrasound or mammogram showed any signs of cancer. However, because there is that “something palpable” hiding in there somewhere-Autumn could feel it too-I most likely do have to have a consult with the surgeon. Meanwhile, I’ll be here at work by myself for at least another three hours. Fun times.

So, to sum up, today I have had a pap smear, breast exam, ultrasound, mammogram, blood work, been told to get back into my size 4 pants, and do that by not eating virtually anything, especially CHOCOLATE, and now I’m at work until 8pm. Oh, and there could very well be a surgery in the near future. I think it’s fair to say, “March 2, 2010, I don’t like you very much.”